Weigh-in Saturday!

Hey, kiddos!
You’ve read that right, it’s weigh-in day! I haven’t written one of these in years and I’ve really missed taking time out of my Saturday to reflect on how my weight loss journey is progressing. Currently, my plan is to update you (yes, you) and my other lovely readers on how things are going. Transparency is something I’ve lost over the years, not because I’m ashamed of how I’m doing, far from it. I just haven’t made being transparent about my journey a priority, much like my health in general.

So…with that, I would like to introduce you to the new Saturday weigh-in format! Every week you’ll see these questions along with any other nugget of randomness I can throw in.

Here we go! [insert “The Final Countdown” synthesizer tune here.]

The Rundown
How did I do?
This past week was a little out of the ordinary. My 31st birthday was last Saturday (hooray for being a fully functional thirtysomething!) and my parents were in town! Last time they were in Seattle it rained the entire time. This time: the weather was perfect. So we walked a lot and enjoyed allllll of the deliciousness Seattle has to offer from Duke’s fish and chips to drinking chocolate at Fran’s. While I didn’t stay on the healthy eating path the whole time they were here, I was back at it for the rest of the week. So this week I actually lost 2.8 pounds this week! I’ve started tracking using the MyFitnessPal app (don’t tell Oprah!) because I’ve gotten pretty lazy when it comes to tracking everything. Personally, it’s been pretty easy for me to stay complacent when tracking because there are soooooo many zero point options now. It’s easy to fudge your tracking (and by fudge I mean you eat more fudge) and forget that just because those foods are zero points, they are still calories…and fat…and carbs…and sodium. (WW folks, how do you like the new Freestyle System? Let me know in the comments!) Anyway, between tracking and hitting up the gym four times this week, I was stoked with that loss.

Current Weight: 268.6 pounds

Total weight loss: -88.4

Favorite meal last week:
By far and away my favorite meal of the week was on my birthday at Flintcreek Cattle Co. in the Greenwood neighborhood in Seattle. Their menu includes an array of delicious western ranch-raised meats along with game like boar and venison. I had the 12oz ribeye topped with a glorious compound butter. I was a huge fan of not only the food but the awesome vibe and that it’s tucked in one of my favorite understated parts of the Emerald City. Definitely, go check it out!

What went well last week?
I’ve been a lot more intentional about treating food as a strength trainer rather than a counselor. I don’t rely on food to make me feel better. That’s what exercising is for!

What will I work on this upcoming week?
I’m super excited to hang out with two awesome sets of friends tonight! I’m so happy that we’ve found these pockets of awesome people wherever we lived. From Dim Sum in the International District to a 90s pop dance party in Belltown, it should be a fun night!

(Stay tuned this week for a post about my peeps!)

Overall, I’m really happy about the momentum this new year has brought. I’m also really happy that this blog is back in my life. I can’t wait to see where this journey goes from here.

Stay awesome.







Figuring it all out

Looking Forward

“Why, hello. Haven’t seen you here in a while…”

I don’t know why I haven’t posted in so long. I’ve opened this blog page, tried to type, came up with some solid draft ideas, and then lost steam. I kept trying to come up with some epic post with Mark Morrison’s “Return of the Mac” blasting from the heavens as I return to my blogtastic glory.

But life doesn’t work that way.

The blog has been such an important part of the past almost decade of my life. Not only did it serve as the trailhead of my weight loss journey, it shaped my skills as a writer. I also hoped that it would help encourage others to become healthier. Not out of any selfish hope, but because I knew how much better my life was inside and out once I made that change in my own life.

“So…why did you stop blogging, Nathan?” 

I think I stopped writing because I was ashamed of gaining some weight back. When I weighed 225, I dealt with some dark stuff. I hated how I looked. With a capital “h” hated. I felt like I was this rubber band that was stretching myself out to new links, but deep down I knew that I would snap back one day. And it did, but it could have been way worse.

Somehow, I think that stunted my weight-loss growth. I think instead of confronting some of those issues (you know…when you realize that you feel feelings that aren’t always happy) so I resorted back to food instead of confronting them.

What I’ve realized this week is that you really don’t truly grasp the concept of self-preservation until you’re 29 and a half. Whether you like it or not, you figure out that you have to watch out for yourself. Whether that’s your job, your friendships, or your health. I’ve pushed myself really hard in my late 20s and it took its toll on my health. I was really hard on myself. In fact, that has been on every job evaluation I’ve ever had. I wasn’t trying to be perfect, I was trying to do it all. Don’t get me wrong. I’m glad I did because I got to work on some amazing projects with some amazing people, but I’ve finally realized that it’s OK to take a step back.
Not every fight is my own.

“So…what now?”
Well, I am going to start writing again. I still wear the FFK moniker as a badge of honor. I love inspiring others. I feel that it’s what I am called even at a spiritual level. If every day of my life isn’t spent helping others, then what’s the point?

For years, I have pushed other people to embrace and promote the personal brand they want others to see. I haven’t been doing that. For the past three years, I’ve been this weight loss has-been. Now, it’s time to practice what I preach. It’s time to keep moving forward.

Why I’ve Gained 30 Pounds

I’m having a rough night and I need to talk about it.

For the past two years, I have slowly gained 30 pounds back from my lowest weight of about 225 pounds. Want to hear the weirdest part? I didn’t know why until tonight.

So yes, two years ago I did start a new job and I thought that was why for a long time. But today, I finally realized what happened that first week of work that created this mess.

Dear reader, it’s weird…

Here we go…
In my office at work, I have two screens: my MacBook Pro laptop screen and my 24″ Apple monitor which is perfect for Photoshop and other design programs. A few weeks in to my new job, I turned off the monitor and I saw myself, my 225 pound self, in the screen. Then a voice that was essentially non-existent in my life, or at least one that had been silent for years, popped into my brain. “Holy crap! You are still fat! You know that, right?” It was like years of suppressed negativity crashed through my mental fortress of positivity. At that moment, I stopped loving myself. From that moment on, I saw a fat version of myself in that screen and any other reflective surface for that matter. I even saw it today and told myself the same thing. It felt like after that day, instead of working harder in the gym (which still wasn’t the right answer), I ate my feelings and essentially lost any amount of self-control I had.

I know this doesn’t make any sense. Please don’t try to explain how the image I see in the screen is a refraction so it’s larger. I knew that then and I know that now. Sadly, none of that matters to the part of my brain that controls my self image. All it sees is a fat Nathan. I think the reality of it is that I hadn’t confronted a lot of the serious body image issues I had dealt with all my life. I guess I kept them in check by losing weight and exercising. Eventually, those successes wore off and my guard was down. This is a lot of the reason why I’ve been silent on the blog for the past few years. I haven’t valued my success myself the way I should.

So now what? Now that I’ve figured out this possible root cause, how do I make this gain just a slight detour in my life? To be honest, I’m not too sure. I do, however, feel like a small proverbial weight has been lifted off my chest. I know it will take time to lose those 105,000 calories, but I’m ready to get back in the right direction.

More importantly though, I’m ready to love myself again.

Guest Post: Do or Do Not…

Back in the summer, I asked my good friend and weight-loss juggernaut Stephanie to write a guest post for my blog. After some things fell through on my end, I decided to wait until today to post it. Stephanie’s amazing story of transformation inside and out continues to inspire me to keep going. I’m so proud to call her my friend. Take it away, Steph!

A few months ago, Nathan asked me to write this guest-post for the FFK blog. However, I wasn’t sure where to even begin telling you about this journey that has led to a loss of over 147lbs and more than 97 inches in the last 2 years. Do you ever feel like you have multiple personalities duking it out in your head? You know the personalities of the drill sergeant, the self-defeatist, and the peace-love-happiness-dude? Yeah. That was me, and sometimes it still is when it comes to this journey down the path of fitness. For the longest time, I wondered why anyone would ever want to hear my story, and then the drill sergeant would start barking “Just do it!” while the peace-love-happiness-dude sat at his drum chanting “It’s all good maaaaaan.” After a while, I realized that we all bring our different struggles to the floor when it comes to fitness. We all have our stories of ups and downs, of days of triumph and days when that snooze button on the alarm becomes our best friend. So this is my story – ups, downs, triumphs and all.

Hi! My name is Steph, and I have developed an addiction to fitness. It’s pretty awesome, really. At the age of 41- yep, I just told you my age *deep breath* – I’m happily addicted to the energy and the soreness that comes along with becoming a fitter, healthier me. However, it hasn’t always been that way. I have struggled with weight issues throughout my entire life. Growing up, my body developed faster than most of my fellow classmates. As a third grader, I was often mistaken for a high school student. My fellow fourth grade classmates made up a little song about me and how much bigger I was than everyone else. “BBT…bye bye tree.” Hearing that song sung every time I walked by the other kids is something I will never forget. I was more than embarrassed when I was told what it meant; I was devastated and heartbroken. BBT was their secret code for calling me “big butt.” Up until that point, I never saw myself as being “fat.” As a 5’ 4” fourth grader, I was just bigger than all the other kids in my grade…at least in my eyes. Yet that song still rang in my head for years to come. At home, I was often reminded that I was, indeed, fat. In high school, I was sent to a diet center, where I was given a bunch of pills and was put on a strict diet of salads for lunch and a couple of bran muffins for breakfast. Yes, I lost some weight, but I also found myself constantly hungry from lack of proper nutrition. Needless to say, my visits to that diet center stopped within a few months, and that action was much to the disapproval from the homefront.

Steph at 343 lbs.

Steph at 343 lbs.

It was towards the end of my high school days that I fell in love with running. There was something about the freedom I felt once my feet started pounding the dirt on the trails by the railroad tracks. In college, I ran 10-15 miles every week. Running became my solace and source of centering. It was where I could turn up the volume on my headphones and get lost in the rhythmic beats of my body pulsing to the music. However, that source of peace ended my junior year when I was on the verge of hospitalization due to a battle with mono that had been in my system for more than 6 months before ever being diagnosed and had already gone through multiple relapse stages. The viral load in my body was so high that my liver was beginning to shut down. I could barely function. All I could manage for months-on-end was going to class, sleep, eating, and more sleep. As a result, I started gaining weight. It took several years before I had the energy to start exercising again, but by that time, I had gained at least 60lbs.

After many years of stress from life, the graduate school effect, poor eating and lack of exercise, I found myself buried underneath an excessive amount of weight – 200lbs in excess to be exact. Looking back, I think I got to a point where I hid my true self underneath all the big clothes and extra padding. I felt ashamed of who I was and what I had become. In my mind, I was living up to so many other people’s expectations of them saying that I was never good enough or did anything right. I didn’t want my photo taken because I never wanted to see myself. I got tired of people looking at me like I was some sort of alien blob. I tried various fad diets, including a fairly expensive ($300/month) program where you purchase their products (shake mixes, powdered foods, snack bars, etc…) and caloric intake is no more than 900 calories/day. Sure, I lost weight, but none of these things taught me how to eat properly, nor did they encourage or emphasize the benefits of exercise. I ended up gaining all of the weight back and then some. I learned an important lesson: there are no quick fixes…none.

By October of 2012, I was living in a highly stressful and unhealthy home environment and had also just completed 3 years of coursework towards my PhD. I woke up one morning to find that I couldn’t eat. My body had started shutting down and rejecting food. My hair was falling out in clumps; I was literally going bald. Insomnia started kicking in, and my energy was nowhere to be found. Sadly, it took all of that to get my attention. I decided that it was time to take control over my life. I needed to make a change, and it needed to start ASAP. (Notice I said “needed to start” and not “needed to happen.”)

Years back, I had purchased a workout program from this company called Beachbody. I did it a few times, but then it just sat in my dvd collection for a number of years. I had signed up for a free account, where I could track my progress on the workouts, but I had totally forgotten about it. When I got to the point in my life where I needed to start taking immediate action for my health, I looked up my Beachbody account and started searching for someone to mentor me and keep me on-track. I tried a couple of different workout programs; however, I felt I wasn’t being challenged enough. In November, my coach told me about this workout program that was up for pre-order and would be delivered in December. It was Les Mills Combat, a mixed-martial arts based program developed in New Zealand by a British duo, one an MMA fighter and the other a Muay Thai fighter. I took one look at the program previews and knew I needed it in my life. I went all out and started with the Ultimate Warrior package – the toughest level of the program. I needed a challenge, and this was definitely it. December 14, 2012, I pushed play and haven’t looked back since.

In the first 60-day round of the Ultimate Warrior calendar, I had a total loss of 18 inches and 26.8 lbs. So far, I have completed 10 full rounds Les Mills Combat Ultimate Warrior and 1 round of a hybrid with Les Mills Combat/Les Mills Pump. After having been on this journey for 23 months, I have lost 147.6lbs and 97.25 inches overall thus far. I am a new person, both inside and out. Les Mills Combat has been my lifesaver and guide. It centers me, it challenges me, and it brings joy to my life. I have discovered that regular exercise and proper nutrition with whole foods are 2 of my best friends. Every day, I wake up excited to see the changes happening both with the inside and outside of my body. I still have a ways to go on my journey, but I am enjoying every feeling of “change.” Sure, I still have my cheat days. Who doesn’t? I’ll readily admit my weakness for a good, dark chocolate and maybe a coffee treat on occasion. And then I keep moving forward.

There was a wise man who once spoke the words, “Do or do not. There is no try.” Okay, so maybe Yoda isn’t really a “man,” per se, but the words still ring true. One thing I have learned in in the journey of fitness and health is either you do it or you don’t do it. I have come to realize over a lifetime of struggle, the concept of “trying” always set me up with an option to fail. I was given a way out, an excuse to give up. “Oh well, at least I tried.” A life-journey on the road of fitness and health is just as much of a mental challenge as it is a physical one. You have to want to make the change, to take on the daily challenge of battling those multiple personalities in your head. No one else can do it for you. You must find your reason for moving forward, and that must become your focus. For me, I needed to find myself. Much of my research work in school is about the healing of trauma. I realized that I needed to heal myself before I could ever fully immerse myself in helping others.

Wise Yoda is.

Wise Yoda is.

Yes, there are still days where the self-defeatist personality wakes up and all those voices from my past that tell me I’m not good enough. But I never give up. Nor should you. Never give up, no matter what. Let me repeat that. NEVER GIVE UP, NO MATTER WHAT!

Before and After Faces of Steph Before and After StephWe all have our battles to fight. So stand up, strap on your gloves, and get to fighting. Be the awesomeness that you are in all that you do. You are worth every single drop of sweat and every sore muscle that makes you walk like Frankenstein for a few days. I know that if I can change my body and my life for the positive, anyone can! Decide you want to change. Commit to making the change. You will find success. It won’t be an easy road – change never is. However, it will be one of the best decisions you will you ever make. I’m here, cheering for you. Keep it real and stay with the fight!

Stephanie is a fitness enthusiast, musician, PhD candidate at Florida State University, and an Independent Beachbody Coach. She can be reached via email at esbythorne@gmail.com or coachesby@beachbodycoach.com.

How to Change the Face of Men’s Health With Movember

HP MovemberFor years, men across the world have made November the month to grow a lusciously lumberjack-esque thick beard which was colloquially known as “No Shave November”. When I was in college, I would give my razor a rest and try to grow a studtastic beard, but it always ended up in a disastrous and patchy mess that just pronounced my double (well…quadruple) chin. That was until a few years ago when I decided to do something about my health.

You see, for years I was relied on ignorance as a key to being happy. At 357 pounds, I knew I was a ticking time bomb but I pushed down that sadness with food and by being loud and crazy. Now that I’m healthier, but still loud and crazy, my mission in life is to help others become the best version of themselves by making the most of their lives by being healthy! And I’m not just talking about fitness either.

Here are a few facts for you:

  • 1 in 7 men will be diagnosed with prostate cancer in their lifetime
  • Around 15 million American adults (6.7% of the population) are diagnosed with depression each year.
  • Testicular cancer is the most common cancer in young men aged 15 – 35 years

So this year, I will be growing a moustache to change the face of men’s health with Movember.

For the next 30 days, my upper lip will be home the only hair on my face. But this month is more than just growing a studly handlebar, it’s about spreading the word of men’s health and the importance of prevention.

How am I doing that, you ask? By challenging you two ways! Here’s how!

Nate & Cat’s Shavetastic Spectacular Movember Challenge!

FFK MovemberFor the past three years, my buddy Catherine Williams and I have been trying to put together a video and a challenge for Movember. 2014 IS THE YEAR!!!! Catherine, who is an awesome champion for ALS awareness, and I came up with a challenge that is fun, easy, and could potentially leave you smelling like sandalwood.

Here’s what you do:

  1. Watch the video above
  2. Decide if you want to accept the challenge and donate $5 to N&CSSMC, or go double or nothing and try to shave a balloon with it popping.
  3. If you decide to shave a balloon…get a balloon, silly!
  4. Lather said balloon
  5. Start shaving
  6. If it pops, donate $10 and challenge two friends
  7. If it doesn’t, brag about your awesomeness and challenge two of your friends
  8. Have fun with your challenge! Post a video of you shaving the balloon on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or your favorite social media challenge. Don’t forget to tag the poor souls you’re challenging!

PLEASE NOTE: We are not liable for any injury or shaving cream mess that comes from this challenge. Shave your balloon at your own risk…or just donate the $5!

Simple enough? Awesome!


Here’s the second way to donate!


Stachetastic Run SponsorsLast year, I challenged my friends on Facebook do donate a dime to Movember.
Pure and simple. Well…sort of.
I asked them donate a dime for each mile I ran that month. At first, I asked for 10 people to commit. I ended up with close to 25 sponsors. That’s $2.50 for every mile! This year, I am looking for more sponsors and I’m asking for a dime a mile again! Last year, I only ran 50 miles so each person donated at least $5! That’s still $125 towards men’s health!

Are you up to the challenge? If you are, comment on this post either below or on Facebook! I’ll tally up the miles and let you know how much you owe at the end of the month!

So I know I’m potentially asking a lot from you and at this point you’re probably wondering where this money is all going. Fair point! Last year, Movember USA alone raised over 22 million dollars towards research and education of testicular and prostate cancer research and prevention and creating awareness of issues surrounding men’s mental health. According to Movember’s independent auditors, 83.3% of the funds went directly to research which is above the international best practice standard for cause-based donations. For more information on where your money will go, click here.

If you decide not to donate, I do ask that you do think about your state of health. I ask you to get educated and to find out how to become a person that your future self will thank in years to come. Moustache or not, make this month about you and your health.



Psst…want to join in on the Movember fun? Join my team Moustaches Are Cool! Click here to join!


AllonsyWhile Olivia Pope is kind of my spirit animal (or should I say spirit professional) ever since I got hooked on Scandal over the summer, a new amazing show has taken over that  9 pm Thursday timeslot in my TV heart: Gracepoint. An American version of the British show Broadchurch, Gracepoint follows Breaking Bad’s Anna Gunn and the Doctor himself, David Tennant, through a murder investigation in a quiet seaside California town. As the cliché goes, not everything is as it seems…or something ominous like that. Tonight’s episode peeled back some of the layers to the crime and you can tell things are about to get interesting. In a weird way, it sort of reminds me of Twin Peaks, except Dale Cooper is a little more chipper than the constantly-pissed-off Emmett Carver.

So why “Allons-y!”?
Well, as most of you know, (based on my marketing research analysis, my readers are young professionals who are equally as awesome and goofy as I am. However, 95% of my views still come from my Mom…) “Allons-y” was the catchphrase of sorts for the Tenth Doctor who was played by, you guessed it, David Tennant. It is a french term for “let’s go” and is actually the name of a song in the upcoming Pink Floyd album. (Well…Pink Floyd Sans Roger Waters. Not sure if that still technically constitutes Pink Floyd. Can you really be a band if a key member who was the mastermind for your most popular album isn’t a part of the band anymore? It’s kind of like Ringo Starr revamping The Beatles on his own even though Paul McCartney is still alive. Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, Allons-y…) So the Doctor usually said “Allons-y” while he was heading into possible peril in his trusty TARDIS and you never really knew how it was going to all turn out.

That’s kind of how I feel right now.

On Tuesday, I signed up for my first trail half marathon. Oh yeah…and it’s in flippin’ January. The first week of January to be exact. AKA: 12 weeks from Saturday. My previous halfs have been flat, on asphalt and in pretty decent weather. The Swamp Forest Trail Half is going to be hilly, on a mixed media of gravel, rocks and roots, and is during the coldest month in Tallahassee. While I am pretty stoked, I have a lot of work to do. I’ve just gotten back into running and while it’s been going pretty well, doing even 10 miles at this point sounds almost impossible. Thankfully, I do have a lot going for me: I have trained for halfs before, there are plenty of long trails in Tallahassee and it is slowly cooling off. One other random benefit is that training is going to keep me honest during the holidays since the race is essentially a week after Christmas. What can I say? I love a good challenge.

So, I have my weekends planned for the next 12 weekends:
Watch football.
(Oh yeah, and go to Tristan and Catherine’s wedding extravaganza in Durham, North Carolina! #TristCatWedFest)

Finally tonight, I do have some other really cool news…
I haven’t really talked about my eating on here, but it is in an amazing place right now. I’m eating so many more fruits and veggies and I feel better than I ever have. I’m finally back to sustainable weight loss. No more of this lose 5 pounds one week and gaining 12 pounds the next week. I am just staying patient and knowing that the weight will come off. Not water weight, actual weight. In the meantime, I’ll keep running, eating salads, lifting Henrietta and being awesome. Allons-y!

Day 37 A Declaration

This morning was hard for me. I woke up just feeling like crap about my weigh in and just how I kind of trashed my body over the weekend. I know I’m human and I like to indulge, but at what cost? Is it worth eating until I’m physically sick all night into the next day? No. My body deserves much better than that and I’m the only one in control of it.

While I have made some awesome strides in the past few weeks, I have realized that I need direction with my weight and health. After losing 100 pounds in the first 11 months of this journey, I have been in a weird lose/gain/plateau cycle for the past three years. Am I just going to stay some terminal weight loser who keeps losing the same weight all the time? To quote Brooke Birmingham: I want to be an “After.” You see, I have big plans for this body. Loose skin and all. I have already taken my current body to the limit. It’s time to take it up a notch.

I am at a point where I have completely lost sight of the finish line and that scares me in a lot of ways. This is my pivotal moment to take that turn around the trail and finish the race.


Starting today Monday, June 9th, 2014, I am committing to lose 75 pounds by June 9th, 2015. Which means I will weigh 180 pounds.

Now this might sound crazy to some of you and that’s fine, I know your heart is in the right place, but the fact of the matter is that I need a long-term goal to focus my energy towards. I can’t just run around in a circle like I have been. While I have lost a lot of weight, I’m still considered obese. I need to fix that.

So this is it. It’s time to get to a healthy weight.

So this it, dear readers. I need your support now more than ever (I seriously hate that phrase. Sorry I used it).

If I don’t accept your offer of cookies and chocolate covered pork rinds, please don’t take it personal.

If I decline an invite to a restaurant full of my favorite trigger foods, it’s not you, it’s me.

If I look like I’m phoning it in at the gym, call me out on it.

So here we go. The final push towards my goal. See ya tomorrow.


Day 24 Hello!

So day was full of so much PR win for the FFK blog!

Since I know most of my views have been coming from my buddy Stephan Pagano (who is one of my weight loss heroes. So much so that I wrote a post about his awesomeness a while back…) So allow me to introduce myself!

Hello. My name is Nathan, but I’m also known as the Fotographing Fat Kid. Nice to meet you! I’ve lost over 100 pounds since September 2010 and you can read my story here! You might wonder why it says Day 24 even though I’ve being on my weight loss journey since 2010. Well, a few days ago, 24 days to be exact, I hit the reset button on the whole thing to kick start my weight loss again! I hope that clears up any confusion!

So, let’s get to it!

After yesterday’s breakthrough that I didn’t need a holiday to be surrounded with food, I felt awesome and confident. Dare I say… confidently awesome! Let’s talk food!

photo 2Breakfast: I was going to swim this morning before work, but I had a crappy night’s sleep so I hit the snooze because sometimes sleep is more important than exercise (if anything so you won’t go to your job grouchy only to lose said job which leads to you not being able to afford a gym membership. See? It all works out!) Anyway, I made my favorite blueberry muffin smoothie with old fashioned oats, vanilla almond milk, fresh kale from the farmers market (which tastes so much better than the bagged variety), frozen blueberries, peanut butter and flax seeds. It was ridiculous, kids! I know it looks like mud, but it actually looked like a blended up Barney the Dinosaur. 10 points. It’s usually 8, but I added a little extra peanut butter because I’m naughty like that ;).

photo 3Lunch: I wasn’t really hungry until around 2 PM so I just decided to go Brooklyn Water Bagels for a couple of slices of pizza. I avoided the toppings to shave off some points. Every point counts, right? 15 points





photo 4Dinner: I didn’t get home until close to 8 tonight and I really wanted to just go out and gorge myself on something unhealthy. But deep down, I knew that it was something I would regret. For most of my life, that regret wasn’t enough for me to avoid that situation. Thankfully, Megan, my super stud of a wife, had an awesome idea for a deliciously filling dinner! We bought a lemon pepper rotisserie chicken from Publix along with a bag of salad and some Bolthouse Farms Parmesan Cesar dressing. I shredded up half of a chicken breast and then ate two drumsticks and a wing because I was that hungry. I was pretty proud of my awesome dinner because I have never counted my portions when we’ve gotten a rotisserie chicken. BOOM. WIN. 20 points.

For dessert, I had a glass of milk and some strawberries. 2 points.

So today I got to 47 points out of my 48 point allotment! I’m uber proud of myself today. Time to keep the momentum going! See ya tomorrow for a great Wordless Wednesday!

photo 1


Trying to Get it All Aligned

“When the mooooooooooooon is in the seventh house
and Jupiterrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr lines with Mars…

Wait…that’s not what I mean…

You hear it all the time “get fit in the gym, lose weight in the kitchen.” While I have fought with this notion for a long time, I’ve seen how true it really is through out my weight loss journey. With that, it’s been easy to have one component of that statement down and have the other one completely lopsided.When I lost my first 100 pounds, my eating was at the forefront of this journey. Sure I worked out, but making smart decisions helped peel off the weight. Some time after that, I lost sight of that. I got caught up in the fitness side a little too much and it seemed to throw me off because I didn’t know how to refuel properly with my eating. Then, I started training for my first half marathon which kind of put my weight loss dead in the water because, contrary to popular belief, you don’t always lose weight when you train for long distance races like half marathons. So right now, I’m not training for a specific race. I’ve put on about 15 pounds since December so I want to get that off ASAP to get my weight loss momentum going.

Since I’ve been working out regularly, usually a combination of running and circuit training classes 3-5 times a week, I feel awesome and actually strong for the first time in close to forever. In the past, I’ve been quick to beat myself up when I want to go work out in the “bro den” (the part of the gym that has free weights, benches, awkward grunting) because I don’t feel like I belong. But how can I make progress if I don’t work out in there? (I’m going to talk about more on that in a post I’m working on. Stay tuned.) Anyway, the point is that good things are happening. After working out regularly like this for the past ten weeks, it would be really hard to stop. I just love it too much!

So now that I’m in such an awesome place with my fitness, I’m really working to change my eating. I’m eating fruits and veggies like they’re going out of style and I’m incredibly intentional about drinking water (#alltheclearpee).

But I’m not perfect…
Can I still pound down a bag of potato chips? Yessir.
Do I hoard candy sometimes like those spoiled brats in Willie Wonka? Sure do.
But…Do I immediately regret it? Now more than ever.

I really hate that feeling of regret after a mini-binge, so I’ve been trying to combat that with just abstaining as much as I can. I tell myself that I won’t miss it in 5 minutes because all they are are just impulses. For example, we walked by a cupcake store in Tallahassee and I thought I really wanted one.

I knew I had two options:
1) Keep walking and go on with my day
2) Go in, spend money on a dessert that I’m generally kind of ambivalent towards, and then sulk because I could have spent those Weight Watchers points on bacon.

So, I’m making progress with my eating! I really feel like I’m on the verge of everything lining up for some serious weight loss awesomeness.

Speaking of weight loss…

I lost 2.8 pounds this week! After losing 3 pounds or so two weeks ago, I gained it back last week. (Between kidney stones and traveling, the MacDonalds have been a little cray…) This week, I wasn’t perfect at all. In fact (and if you try to troll me on this, so help me…) I had McDonald’s for the first time since we’ve lived in Tallahassee. I drove to Jacksonville twice this week and I really needed some coffee and breakfast. So, I had an Egg McMuffin and a hash brown. It was 12 points. I counted it and I moved on. I also ate at Hardee’s for breakfast one day and I counted it too. So I wasn’t perfect, but I counted my points and I exercised to bring balance to the Weight Watchers force. This past week was once again proof that when you count regardless and exercise, everything will fall into place.

Count all the points